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Soaking Away my Sins
Surrendering to sleep until seven-thirty am
Simultaneously staring at the streaked shower glass
Soaking in a salty mix of Epsom salts and frankincense
Waiting the twenty minutes it takes for hopeful detoxification
Sweating it out while sipping on cinnamon-laced ACV tea
Striving for Nirvana
Wanting the pain, to disappear down the drain
As it takes the salts, poisons, and sins with it.
I have to say, I did feel a sight better after my little bath this morning and from there I commenced to partake in a new twist on a borrowed recipe from Nutiva for breakfast-but the only part of the recipe I used was the basic chia pudding, this time it set up properly and other than a strange sort of mouth- feel from what I supposed was the type of coconut milk I used, ( I used So Delicious Brand Culinary Coconut Milk) it was pretty good! To that, I added some flax, frozen blueberries, and some coconut-chia granola and it was a yummy, breakfast pudding indeed!
After a teary night last night because I was feeling so out of sorts, I’m hoping for a better day today. I’m trying to detox and prepare for my pre-op the best I can and part of that is getting the house ready for me coming home and not being allowed to bend over or lift heavy items. So what I’m supposed to do if put the things I need to use every day at eye level, tomorrow I will wash the bed sheets and tomorrow night, I will shower with the special kit containing the only soap I’m to use (you have to scrub from chin to toes for two minutes) and then crawl in a clean bed after also removing all of my jewelry.
Thursday morning I will be up rather early to arrive at the hospital by 5:30am, I think surgery is actually scheduled for 7:30am. I know I’ll be in good hands but I can’t stop thinking about all the what-ifs. They are messing with my spinal cord after all, as well as replacing two of my discs in my neck, I literally will never be the same after that. (Hopefully, I will be better!) Maybe I’ll be stronger, pain-free and able to leap tall buildings in a single bound…oh wait, that’s Superman. Oh well, I’ll be more like the bionic woman by the time I have a new neck and a new knee!
I’m still feeling blue about the issues mentioned yesterday, yet I will strive for relaxation and try not to think of things that cause me guilt and sorrow and pray that after my surgery is behind me I can once again find the true joy of Christmas, which is having my WHOLE family together and that the gift-giving thing resolves on its own.
(Ugh! I just realized I never hit publish on yesterday’s post! I will post it first-then I will publish this one. Sorry folks, my bad.)
(If you click on the link, you can see the original recipe from Nutiva)